


The Stranger the Better

by Birds_of_forgiveness



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Alternate Universe - Modern: Still Have Powers, Bad Flirting, Banter, Bard Jaskier | Dandelion, Established Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, F/M, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia and Jaskier | Dandelion Go To The Coast, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia is Still a Witcher, Humor, M/M, Multi, POV Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Sorceress Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, additional tags to be added as i write the actual plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:00:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26718646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Birds_of_forgiveness/pseuds/Birds_of_forgiveness
Summary: Yennefer rents a cottage by the sea for some long overdue rest and relaxation. Unfortunately, the loud obnoxious couple next door seems to have other plans.Yennefer opened the sliding glass door and stood on her little balcony overlooking the sea. Her silk black robe fluttered with the light breeze that lifted the air. She took a deep breath in and let her worries flow out of her with the exhale. She was looking forward to thirty one glorious days of nothing but the calm sea quiet nature.A voice from her right pierced through Yennefer’s relaxation. “Geraaaaalt!!!! Come help me with my luggage, you brute! I can’t possibly bring this all in when I have my lute to carry!”Yennefer sighed. She was going to have to commit murder, wasn’t she.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Jaskier | Dandelion/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
Comments: 8
Kudos: 61





	The Stranger the Better

This was finally going to be  _ her _ summer. 

Yennefer had been planning this vacation for ages. She tied up all her loose ends at Aretuza, bullied Tissaia into bundling all the vacation days she had missed after working there for twelve years, and rented a quaint little beach house on the Redanian coast. A perfect cottage by the sea, and it was  _ all _ hers. Nothing could be better than a full blessed month of alone time and self care. 

Yennefer opened the sliding glass door and stood on her little balcony overlooking the sea. Her silk black robe fluttered with the light breeze that lifted the air. She took a deep breath in and let her worries flow out of her with the exhale. She was looking forward to thirty one glorious days of nothing but the calm sea quiet nature.

A voice from her right pierced through Yennefer’s relaxation. “ _ Geraaaaalt!!!!  _ Come help me with my luggage, you brute! I can’t possibly bring this all in when I have my lute to carry!”

“You didn’t have to pack so much.” A deeper voice rang out in reply. Yennefer scowled and peered off the side of her balcony. She spotted a large black trunk parked in front of the neighboring cottage she hadn’t before noticed the presence of. 

“Darling, you wound me! Of course I had to. What do you take me for, a charlatan?” A foppish looking young man dressed head to toe in chaotic colorful garb was standing astride the trunk waving around what looked to be a classical lute. He gestured wildly to another man who was just out of Yennefer’s view. She shifted to get a better look.

“I take you for a ponsy clot.” The second man, Geralt, if the initial complaint was any indication, stepped out from behind a tree. He looked to be the other man’s opposite in nearly every way. Dressed in all black with distinctive light hair and a stern look, he began to pull suitcases out of the truck. 

The other man shifted to a markedly flirtatious tone, “Oh? You’ll take me, will you?”

Geralt began walking towards the cottage. “I’ll take you with me to the grave if you don’t hurry your sorry ass up.”

“Touchy, touchy. I’m honored my ass remains on the forefront of your mind.”

“Jaskier!”

“ _ Coming! _ ” The man, presumably Jaskier, paused for what Yennefer could only imagine was for dramatic effect. “At least, I will be if—”

“I will lock you out if you finish that sentence.”

“Darling, as if you’d ever stop me from finis—”

Yennefer heard the sound of a door slamming shut.

“Geralt, dear, now you’re just being childish.” He paused. “I promise I’ll suck your dick if you let me in?”

The door creaked open and Jaskier slipped in. The last thing Yennefer heard before the door slammed shut again was Jaskier’s smug tone saying, “You dupe! I would have done it anyway.”

Yennefer sighed. She was going to have to commit murder, wasn’t she. 

She turned and walked back in leaving the door open for now for a soft breeze to flow through the top floor. Her cottage was reasonably modest, after all she was renting alone. One bedroom with a queen sized bed, one luxurious bathroom, a well furnished living room and connected dining room, a tiny kitchen, the balcony, and a small garden out front that the owners assured her was no work at all to maintain. Of course, top notch wifi as well. As much as Yennefer promised herself she would be stepping away from her work life, she didn’t trust those halfwits who temporarily replaced her. 

Yennefer let herself vaguely fantasize about the neatest way to dispose of bodies should the need arise as she poured herself a glass of her favorite Toussaint Red. Her phone chimed from the living room and she sipped her glass as she made her way over, tugging her robe tighter as the chilly breeze brushed her exposed neck. 

Her phone glowed blue.  _ 1 unread message from  _ **_Istredd_ ** . Yennefer rolled her eyes and deleted the message without opening it. Taking another large sip of wine, she considered blocking his number once and for all. The small part of her that delighted in his groveling stopped her. 

Yennefer glanced around the empty room. Unassuming landscape paintings and fine upholstery greeted her sight. She hummed, taking another sip. She could crack open some of the books she had brought with her or take a pleasant walk on the beach or even try out some experimental new spells she had been meaning to master. A world of possibilities were laid out before her! She had all the time in the world. 

She tapped her glass with a dark violet polished nail. The silence felt strangely oppressive and—she would never under any circumstance admit—lonely.  _ Nonsense _ , Yennefer shook her head and dropped her empty glass into the sink.  _ The wine was making her exceptionally morose _ , she concluded. A walk along the beach will surely brighten her spirits and revitalize her excitement for the month ahead. 

Foregoing any formal wear, Yennefer just slipped on some leather sandals that could handle the sandy beach and ventured out the front door, glancing quickly at the neighboring cottage. Satisfied at the silence from within, Yennefer turned and made her way towards the beach. Her cottage was precisely seaside, as she requested. The balcony faced the ocean which was only a few minutes stroll away. 

As Yennefer walked down the sloping path towards the beach, she enjoyed the feeling of the afternoon sun warming her skin. The soft breeze and natural warmth felt wonderfully different from the artificial hustle and bustle of the cities she frequented. 

The moment Yennefer reached the sandy shore, she removed her sandals, vanishing them for now. Her toes sunk slightly into the golden sand.  _ This is what I had been missing _ , Yennefer thought happily.  _ Is there anything better than a distinctive lack of people? _

A noise arose from further down the beach. She narrowed her eyes as she assessed her surroundings. She was not above turning other enjoyers of this beach into slugs for the duration of her walk. Anything to avoid awkward pleasantries and cordially  _ sharing space _ . Another noise helped her locate the source.

“Nng,  _ Geralt. _ ” 

Yennefer recognized Jaskier’s melodic, though exceptionally annoying, voice immediately. It seems the neighbors were quickly making themselves at home.

“Jask, shut the fuck up or you’re going to get us caught.” A low grunt immediately confirmed Yennefer’s suspicions about what was happening behind the dune.

“Geralt, there’s no one aroun— _ oh, _ fuck yes, mm.” 

Yennefer rolled her eyes.  _ Yup, murder it was. It’s the only way.  _ She carefully made her way over to the sand dunes she suspected the pair thought was sheltering them, a plan already forming in her head. 

Her quiet steps seemed somehow to betray her presence nevertheless, and the noises came to an abrupt stop. Yennefer froze.

“Geralt?”

“Someone’s there.” 

Yennefer cursed to herself. They shouldn’t have been able to hear her approach. Perhaps she was growing rusty or perhaps it was the unfamiliar sandy terrain. _ Probably the sand.  _

Jaskier made an indignant noise “Then let them be there! I was promised, and I quote, ‘a dicking so thorough I forgot my own name’ and right now I can  _ very _ clearly recall Julian Alfred Pankratz, Viscount de Lettenhove so if you could kindly get back to—” The sound of a hand covering Jaskier’s mouth interrupted his monologue. Yennefer was sincerely grateful, even as Jaskier continued his now muffled tyrade. 

“You really want us to get thrown out on our first day?” Geralt gruffly replied. Yennefer steeled her spine to stop the shiver that was tempted to run down it from that sinful voice.  _ Shame he’s so obviously taken, _ she mused. 

Jaskier’s reply, however muffled, seemed to indicate he would be happy to pay that price. 

Yennefer cleared her throat. She heard Jaskier whisper, “Don’t worry, I got this.” followed by an unconvinced grunt by Geralt. 

A head popped up from behind the dune. “Hello, my fair lady! And what pleasant business brings you to this lovely little corner of the coast?”

Some scuffling behind the dune pulled his attention away from grinning at Yennefer. “Shut—Geralt,  _ stop. _ I'm  _ handling _ it.”

Yennefer granted the poor man a small mercy by letting him give up this ridiculous charade. “I know you’re fucking behind that dune.” She tried to sound a lot more bored than she was. Afterall, she couldn't let this moron know how entertaining she found this whole endeavour. 

Jaskier sighed dramatically. “The jig is up, Geralt. She’s too clever, saw right through my impervious wiles.” His head popped back behind the dune to the sound of fabric rustling and grumbling. 

“Oh, don’t stop on my account.” She let the breeze carry her voice further than her low murmur naturally would have. 

Her remark was returned with a good natured melodic laugh. “She jokes, Geralt!” Jaskier sounded delighted. “Can we keep her?”

Geralt must have responded nonverbally, if at all, because the next thing she knew, Jaskier was bouncing to his feet and walking over to introduce himself. 

Yennefer immediately began an assessment. He was taller than her first impression of him would suggest, with sparkling blue eyes and an easy smile. His face was flushed attractively and his hair obviously tousled from previous activity. All together, he balanced a roguish sort of charm that she was sure worked on all the barmaids and local lasses while still holding himself like a noble—his polished accent suggesting the same conclusion. He hadn't seemed to have changed out of his ridiculous outfit from earlier and close up she could see the garish overlapping fabrics and clashing colors. The outfit was just towing the line between high fashion and a gaudy knock off.  _ Certainly a lesser noble, a viscount, if his rambles in the throws of passion meant anything. Beyond that he’s either a merchant’s apprentice, young scholar or bard _ , she thought derisively. 

Jaskier sauntered over to her and bowed deeply.  _ He certainly has the presence of a performer.  _ He winked on his way back up.  _ And the cockiness, _ she mused. 

“Julian Alfred Pankratz, Viscount de Lettenhove, better known as Jaskier the Bard—”

_ Nailed it. _

“—charmed to make your acquaintance.”

“Yennefer of Vengerberg. Not even moderately sorry to interrupt.”

Jaskier grinned and chuckled a bit, the blush on his cheeks darkening.  _ He looked rather fetching like that. _ Yennefer dismissed the thought. She wasn’t here to cause drama, as delicious as that may be.

“Yeah, sorry about that.” Jaskier tried to look more sheepish than she was sure he really felt. “Geralt and I—oh, erm, Geralt is my partner.” He twisted back. “Geraaalt! I know for a fact you have less clothes than me. You cannot possibly still be dressing.”

“Leathers and sand do  _ not _ mix, you nop. I warned you this was a bad idea.”

“Oh  _ Geralt _ , what does that even mean.” He shook his head affectionately and turned back to Yennefer whose expression had softened at the exchange. It was so rare to see a couple seem to genuinely love each other. A part of her was jealous, but she wasn’t quite sure of which one yet. 

“So what has brought you to this scintillating strip of serene sunny sea?  _ Ooh! _ ” He seemed overly proud of himself.

Yennefer pointedly did not look impressed. Instead, she tilted her head towards her rented cottage and said, “I’m renting that cottage for the next month.” She glared half heartedly at Jaskier. “I had planned on getting a full month of relaxation to rest and recharge. No one informed me I would be having  _ neighbors _ .” 

“We’ll be naught but a speck of dust on the wall!”

Somehow, she doubted that very much. She conveyed her disbelief, “Mmmhm, I’m  _ sure _ .”

Jaskier lightly laughed her off. “Oh you doubt us, but we can be very inconspicuous! I’m sure you didn’t even realize we had moved in.”

“You arrived in a big black trunk and the first thing out of your mouth was whining  _ his _ name so loud I’m sure the whole neighborhood could hear.”

A snort from behind the dune.  _ At least Geralt seemed to agree.  _

“That’s fair. Although, _ let me tell you _ , this man—”

Grumbles came from behind the dune. At this point, Yennefer was tempted to just anthropomorphize the dune and be done with it. 

“I’m sorry—my  _ partner _ —”

The dune silently agreed. 

“—often leaves me with no choice but to whine my appreciation for all to hear.”

“ _ Jaskier! _ ” The dune was not happy with that tidbit being shared. Yennefer was a little pleased to imagine the bard wanton and shameless. 

“Darling, I only speak the truth.”

“Consider not… doing that,” the dune mumbled. 

Jaskier grinned and looked at Yennefer with a sort of  _ oh, this guy _ expression and she laughed easily. “Oh, I don't mind. I figure a few days in, I’d learn it well enough for myself.”

Jaskier took the bait and, in a suggestive tone, asked, “Learn it for yourself?”

“As your neighbor, of course.” Yennefer was pleased to see Jaskier’s hastily concealed disappointment. 

“Of course.” Jaskier smiled politely. Yennefer held his unflinching gaze even as she felt herself fluster a bit at her own implications.

The sound of shifting sand and creaking leather diverted Yennefer’s attention away from Jaskier’s piercing blue eyes. “I’m heading back to the cottage. Let me know when you’re,” Geralt paused, “done here.” At last, Geralt emerged from behind the sandy shelf and Yennefer gasped under her breath.

“Yeah,” Jaskier said smugly. 

Geralt was still a few paces off, but he was clearly more solidly built than Jaskier, though not much taller from what Yennefer could make out. Her eyes were immediately drawn to his striking long hair that was so fair blond, it looked nearly white. He was dressed in black leathers that attenuate his strong looking arms, broad shoulders, and narrow waist. Yennefer ached to feel all that tightly coiled strength in a more…  _ intimate _ setting. 

“And here comes the…”

Geralt turned and began to walk away. He had a  _ fantastic _ ass. 

“Nice.” Jaskier turned to Yennefer again. “Can’t imagine why he married me, but  _ gods _ am I reminded how lucky I am everyday.”

Yennefer nodded in appreciation. “You certainly have good taste.” 

Jaskier beamed. 

With Geralt’s retreating form disappearing from view, Yennefer tilted her head and asked, “How about we sit down? The sand’s soft enough.” 

“Ay, I can attest to that.” Jaskier was clearly smirking. Yennefer didn’t even need to look over to know that much.

Yennefer shook her head fondly as she gracefully descended, letting her robe flutter into place until she was just decent enough not to be scandalous, but just scandalous enough to be interesting. 

Jaskier plopped down next to her. “What about you? Any golden Adonis or Aphrodite waiting at home for you?”

Yennefer tightened her jaw and resolutely didn’t catch Jaskier’s eyes, staring off into the rolling waves. “My Adonis turned out to be more of a Narcissus,” she said at last. 

Jaskier nodded sympathetically. 

“What are  _ you _ doing bedding your beau on this beautiful breadth of blissful beach?”

A hearty chuckle. “Touché, perhaps you should be the bard between us.”

“I would never step on your toes like that. Besides,” Yennefer wrinkled her nose, “I’m not sure I could pull off those ruffles.”

“You could pull off mine,” Jaskier flirted with an exaggerated wink. 

Yennefer laughed. It had been a while since she could remember laughing so freely. “I think in that case I might be stepping on  _ Geralt’s _ toes.”

Jaskier shrugged and looked towards the sea. The sun, just beginning to dip below the horizon, was carelessly scattering golden rays across the quiet beach. The light caught Jaskier’s windswept brown hair and lit his face angelically. Yennefer wondered how nostalgia could possibly make this moment more honey sweet than it already seemed to be.

He spoke again, his tone purposefully light, but there was a distinct hollow quality he couldn’t quite mask. “Oh, you know how it is, sometimes a very happy couple just loves their life so much they’re desperate to run away from it.”

Yennefer blinked a few times, trying to recount her original question.  _ Oh right, she had asked why Geralt and Jaskier were here.  _ She was a little disappointed in herself for getting sidetracked staring at Jaskier like she was some sort of blushing schoolgirl with a first crush. 

“So, we happily decided to abandon our golden life of marital bliss to see how a life by the sea treated us.” Jaskier paused. “Yeah, I’m not convinced either. We… had a bit of a fight. I think Geralt’s just humoring me to apologize. I’ve always wanted to visit the coast.” His bleak tone didn’t fit what Yennefer knew about the man, even having known him so briefly. 

She impulsively reached for his hand, wanting to vanquish that faraway look in his eyes. “I think you two will be okay.”

If Jaskier was startled, he didn’t show it, simply sliding his eyes back to focus on Yennefer’s—hopefully—encouraging look and smiling sadly. The crinkles tucked away in the corners of his eyes gave away the falsehood of his smile. His real smiles made them bunch up adorably and made his eyes light up like he was looking at the greatest thing he could imagine. Yennefer wondered when she had learned that, and why.

“You look so happy together. Like you’re really in love.”

Jaskier laughed. “You say that like you’ve never seen it before.”

Yennefer stiffened and cursed her tongue. “I just mean it’s rare, genuine love like that.”

Jaskier brushed his thumb along hers. Yennefer hadn’t realized it was still in her grasp. She started to pull away slightly, and Jaskier let her go.

“I suppose I ought to get back to him. Who knows what hijinks he could be up to.”

Yennefer snorted and let the atmosphere lighten. “With you out of the house, I think the hijinks rate has dropped significantly.”

Jaskier’s roguish grin was back, and Yennefer’s heart sped up at the sight. “You wound me, Lady Yennefer, truly. I don’t know if I can go on with this icy spear lanced straight through my beating heart.”

She rolled her eyes, shoving him playfully. “Get back to your man, bard, before this beach suffers more hijinks than it can handle.”

Jaskier sprang up to his feet and bowed dramatically. “Your wish is my command.” He straightened up. “Until we meet again, fair Yennefer of Vengerberg.”

Yennefer did  _ not _ giggle at his antics. Not one bit. In fact, she sat stony faced and resolute, the very picture of disinterested superiority. 

“I can see you holding in a giggle, Yennefer.”

She cursed internally. “Lies and slander, bard. Nothing but lies and slander.” 

He laughed even as he turned and began to walk off towards his cottage, calling over his shoulder, “I’ll tell Geralt you send your regards!”

Yennefer yelled at his retreating back, “You will do no such thing!”

Yennefer heard his last call before he was finally out of earshot: “I can’t hear you so I can only assume you said ‘Yes, Jaskier, please do. I thank you for your kind consideration!’” She was half tempted to get up and yell something back, just to get the last word in, but she felt she’d acted ridiculously enough today. 

Gazing off into the calm rolls of the ocean waves, Yennefer considered her new neighbors.  _ This may be a far more interesting month than expected.  _


End file.
